For the next five minutes， I baited mall rats. Whenever window shoppers stopped or glanced at me， I twitched， smiled， winked， or bowed—to their utter shock and horror！ Of course， this bit of punking provoked uproarious laughter from my co-conspirators watching from outside the store. Afterward they made the case that if my public speaking career ever faltered， I could always find work as a department store dummy.
LIGHT IT UP
I‘ve learned to laugh about my disabilities and the strange responses they provoke， but there is an even better method for overcoming doubts about your self-worth or your inability to love yourself as you are. Instead of dwelling on that pain within， reach out to ease someone else’s pain. Put your focus on someone else in need.
Volunteer at a soup kitchen. Raise money for orphans. Organize a benefit to help earthquake victims. Find sponsors who‘ll donate money if you take part in a charity walk， or bike ride， or dance marathon. Rise up and reach out.
When I do that， I discover what is perhaps the best solution for anyone who has failed to turn on the light of love within.
If you can’t resolve your own issues， be the solution for someone else. After all， it‘s better to give than to receive， right？ If you don’t love yourself， then give yourself away. If you do that， you‘ll be amazed at how valuable you feel.
How do I know that？ C’mon， mate， look at me. Look at my life. Do I seem like a happy and fulfilled person to you？
A nose job won‘t bring you a life of joy. A Ferrari won’t make you admired by millions. You already have what it takes to be loved and valued； it‘s just a matter of releasing and maximizing all that lies within you. You won’t always be perfect， and that‘s perfectly fine. The idea isn’t to attain perfection in your lifetime； it‘s to seek it.
You want to keep striving， keep growing， keep giving all you have to give so that， in the end， you can look back and say， I gave it my best shot.
Take a look in the mirror right now and say， “This is who I am， and I accept the challenge of becoming the best I can be.” You are beautiful because God created you for His purpose. Your challenge is to find that purpose， fuel it with hope， drive it on faith， and put your you-niqueness to the highest possible use.
Loving and accepting yourself is the only surefire cure for self-pity and victimhood. Drugs， alcohol， and promiscuity offer only temporary relief， and eventually they bring only more pain. When I came to see myself as a child of God and a part of His plan， my life was forever changed. You may not be a believer in Christ， but you can believe in your value and purpose on this planet.
BE A FRIEND AND BE HAPPY
My best advice for finding inner happiness is to reach outside yourself， to use your talents and brains and personality to make life better for someone else. I’ve been on the receiving end of that， and I‘m not exaggerating when I tell you that it changed my life.
I was sixteen and a student at Runcorn State High School in Queensland. I usually had to wait an hour or so after school for my ride home. Most days I’d hang out talking to other kids or to a great guy named Mr. Arnold. He wasn‘t the principal or even a teacher. He was the school janitor. But Mr. Arnold was one of those people who glowed from within. He was so at peace with himself， so comfortable in his coveralls， that everyone respected him and enjoyed being around him.
Mr. Arnold could talk about any subject. He was spiritual and wise. On some days he led a Christian youth discussion at lunchtime. He invited me to join， even though I told him I wasn’t big into religion. But I liked him， and so I began attending their sessions.
Mr. Arnold encouraged kids to talk about their lives at these meetings， but I always turned down his invitations. “Come on， Nick， we‘d like to hear your story，” he’d say. “We want to know more about you and what you‘re thinking.”
For three months I refused. “I don’t have a story to tell，” I‘d say.
Finally Mr. Arnold wore me down. The other kids were very open about their feelings and their experiences， so I finally consented to talk about my own at the next meeting. I was so nervous， I prepared note cards with bullet points. （Nerdy， I know.）
I wasn’t expecting to impress anyone. I just wanted to get through it and get out of there， or so I told myself. A part of me also wanted to show the other kids that I had the same feelings， hurts， and fears that they‘d expressed.
For ten minutes that day I talked about what it was like to grow up without arms and legs. I told sad stories and funny stories too. I didn’t want to seem like a victim， so I talked about my victories. Since this was a Christian group， I did say that there had been times when I felt God had forgotten me， or that I‘d been one of His rare mistakes. Then I explained how I’d gradually come to understand that maybe there was a plan for me that I just hadn‘t figured out yet.
“I’m slowly learning to have more faith that I wasn‘t a mistake，” I said， trying to get a laugh.
In truth， I was so relieved to get through my talk that I felt like crying. To my amazement， most of the kids in the room were crying instead.
“Was I that bad？” I asked Mr. Arnold.
“No， Nick，” he said. “You were that good.”
At first I thought he was just being nice and the kids in the group were pretending to be moved by my speech. They were Christians， after all. They were supposed to be nice.
But then one of the guys in the group invited me to speak to his church youth group. Then another invitation came from another kid for his Sunday school class. Over the next two years， I received dozens of invitations to share my story to church groups， youth organizations， and service clubs.
I had avoided Christian groups in high school because I didn’t want to be labeled as the do-gooder preacher‘s kid who was all about religion. I acted tough and sometimes cursed so I could be accepted as a regular guy. The truth was that I had not yet accepted myself.
Obviously， God has a sense of humor. He wrangled me into speaking to just the group I had avoided， and it was there that He revealed my purpose in life. He showed me that even if I was not perfect， I had riches to share， blessings to lighten the burdens of others.
The same holds true for you. We share our imperfection. We need to share the beautiful gifts we’ve been given. Look inside. There is a light inside you just waiting to shine.
