Most likely.But one thing I can tell you for certain, namely, that Zeus and the celestial Triballi are going to send deputies here to sue for peace.Now don't you treat with them, unless Zeus restores the sceptre to the birds and gives you Basileia in marriage.
PITHETAERUS
Who is this Basileia?
PROMETHEUS
A very fine young damsel, who makes the lightning for Zeus; all things come from her, wisdom, good laws, virtue, the fleet, calumnies, the public paymaster and the triobolus.
PITHETAERUS
Ah! then she is a sort of general manageress to the god.
PROMETHEUS
Yes, precisely.If he gives you her for your wife, yours will be the almighty power.That is what I have come to tell you; for you know my constant and habitual goodwill towards men.
PITHETAERUS
Oh, yes! it's thanks to you that we roast our meat.
PROMETHEUS
I hate the gods, as you know.
PITHETAERUS
Aye, by Zeus, you have always detested them.
PROMETHEUS
Towards them I am a veritable Timon; but I must return in all haste, so give me the umbrella; if Zeus should see me from up there, he would think I was escorting one of the Canephori.
PITHETAERUS
Wait, take this stool as well.
(PROMETHEUS leaves.PITHETAERUS goes into the thicket.)CHORUS (singing)
Near by the land of the Sciapodes there is a marsh, from the borders whereof the unwashed Socrates evokes the souls of men.
Pisander came one day to see his soul, which he had left there when still alive.He offered a little victim, a camel, slit his throat and, following the example of Odysseus, stepped one pace backwards.Then that bat of a Chaerephon came up from hell to drink the camel's blood.
(POSIDON enters, accompanied by HERACLES and TRIBALLUS.)POSIDON
This is the city of Nephelococcygia, to which we come as ambassadors.(To TRIBALLUS) Hi! what are you up to? you are throwing your cloak over the left shoulder.Come, fling it quick over the right! And why, pray, does it draggle in this fashion? Have you ulcers to hide like Laespodias? Oh! democracy! whither, oh! whither are you leading us? Is it possible that the gods have chosen such an envoy?
You are undisturbed? Ugh! you cursed savage! you are by far the most barbarous of all the gods.-Tell me, Heracles, what are we going to do?
HERACLES
I have already told you that I want to strangle the fellow who dared to wall us out.
POSIDON
But, my friend, we are envoys of peace.
HERACLES
All the more reason why I wish to strangle him.
(PITHETAERUS comes out of the thicket, followed by slaves, who are carrying various kitchen utensils; one of them sets up a table on which he places poultry dressed for roasting.)PITHETAERUS
Hand me the cheese-grater; bring me the silphium for sauce; pass me the cheese and watch the coals.
HERACLES
Mortal! we who greet you are three gods.
PITHETAERUS
Wait a bit till I have prepared my silphium pickle.
HERACLES
What are these meats?
PITHETAERUS
These are birds that have been punished with death for attacking the people's friends.
HERACLES
And you are going to season them before answering us?
PITHETAERUS (looking up from his work for the first time)Ah! Heracles! welcome, welcome! What's the matter?
POSIDON
The gods have sent us here as ambassadors to treat for peace.
PITHETAERUS (ignoring this)
There's no more oil in the flask.
HERACLES
And yet the birds must be thoroughly basted with it.
POSIDON
We have no interest to serve in fighting you; as for you, be friends and we promise that you shall always have rain-water in your pools and the warmest of warm weather.So far as these points go we are plenipotentiaries.
PITHETAERUS
We have never been the aggressors, and even now we are as well disposed for peace as yourselves, provided you agree to one equitable condition.namely, that Zeus yield his sceptre to the birds.
If only this is agreed to, I invite the ambassadors to dinner.
HERACLES
That's good enough for me.I vote for peace.
POSIDON
You wretch! you are nothing but a fool and a glutton.Do you want to dethrone your own father?
PITHETAERUS
What an error.Why, the gods will be much more powerful if the birds govern the earth.At present the mortals are hidden beneath the clouds, escape your observation, and commit perjury in your name; but if you had the birds for your allies, and a man, after having sworn by the crow and Zeus, should fail to keep his oath, the crow would dive down upon him unawares and pluck out his eye.
POSIDON
Well thought of, by Posidon!
HERACLES
My notion too.
PITHETAERUS (to TRIBALLUS)
And you, what's your opinion?
TRIBALLUS
Nabaisatreu.
PITHETAERUS
D'you see? he also approves.But listen, here is another thing in which we can serve you.If a man vows to offer a sacrifice to some god, and then procrastinates, pretending that the gods can wait, and thus does not keep his word, we shall punish his stinginess.
POSIDON
Ah! and how?
PITHETAERUS
While he is counting his money or is in the bath, a kite will relieve him, before he knows it, either in coin or in clothes, of the value of a couple of sheep, and carry it to the god.
HERACLES
I vote for restoring them the sceptre.
POSIDON
Ask Triballus.
HERACLES
Hi Triballus, do you want a thrashing?
TRIBALLUS
Sure, bashum head withum stick.
HERACLES
He says, "Right willingly."
POSIDON
If that be the opinion of both of you, why, I consent too.
HERACLES
Very well! we accord you the sceptre.
PITHETAERUS
Ah! I was nearly forgetting another condition.I will leave Here to Zeus, but only if the young Basileia is given me in marriage.
POSIDON
Then you don't want peace.Let us withdraw.
PITHETAERUS
It matters mighty little to me.Cook, look to the gravy.
HERACLES
What an odd fellow this Posidon is! Where are you off to? Are we going to war about a woman?
POSIDON
What else is there to do?
HERACLES
