You put our page out: go, you are allow'd;Die when you will, a smock shall be your shroud.
You leer upon me, do you? there's an eye Wounds like a leaden sword. BOYET Full merrily Hath this brave manage, this career, been run. BIRON Lo, he is tilting straight! Peace! I have done.
Enter COSTARD Welcome, pure wit! thou partest a fair fray. COSTARD O Lord, sir, they would know Whether the three Worthies shall come in or no. BIRON What, are there but three? COSTARD No, sir; but it is vara fine, For every one pursents three. BIRON And three times thrice is nine. COSTARD Not so, sir; under correction, sir; I hope it is not so.
You cannot beg us, sir, I can assure you, sir we know what we know:
I hope, sir, three times thrice, sir,-- BIRON Is not nine. COSTARD Under correction, sir, we know whereuntil it doth amount. BIRON By Jove, I always took three threes for nine. COSTARD O Lord, sir, it were pity you should get your living by reckoning, sir. BIRON How much is it? COSTARD O Lord, sir, the parties themselves, the actors, sir, will show whereuntil it doth amount: for mine own part, I am, as they say, but to parfect one man in one poor man, Pompion the Great, sir. BIRON Art thou one of the Worthies? COSTARD It pleased them to think me worthy of Pompion the Great: for mine own part, I know not the degree of the Worthy, but I am to stand for him. BIRON Go, bid them prepare. COSTARD We will turn it finely off, sir; we will take some care.
Exit FERDINAND Biron, they will shame us: let them not approach. BIRON We are shame-proof, my lord: and tis some policy To have one show worse than the king's and his company. FERDINAND I say they shall not come. PRINCESS Nay, my good lord, let me o'errule you now:
That sport best pleases that doth least know how:
Where zeal strives to content, and the contents Dies in the zeal of that which it presents:
Their form confounded makes most form in mirth, When great things labouring perish in their birth. BIRON A right description of our sport, my lord.
Enter DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO Anointed, I implore so much expense of thy royal sweet breath as will utter a brace of words.
Converses apart with FERDINAND, and delivers him a paper PRINCESS Doth this man serve God? BIRON Why ask you? PRINCESS He speaks not like a man of God's making.
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO That is all one, my fair, sweet, honey monarch; for, I protest, the schoolmaster is exceeding fantastical; too, too vain, too too vain: but we will put it, as they say, to fortuna de la guerra.
I wish you the peace of mind, most royal couplement!
Exit FERDINAND Here is like to be a good presence of Worthies. He presents Hector of Troy; the swain, Pompey the Great; the parish curate, Alexander; Armado's page, Hercules; the pedant, Judas Maccabaeus: And if these four Worthies in their first show thrive, These four will change habits, and present the other five. BIRON There is five in the first show. FERDINAND You are deceived; 'tis not so. BIRON The pedant, the braggart, the hedge-priest, the fool and the boy:--
Abate throw at novum, and the whole world again Cannot pick out five such, take each one in his vein. FERDINAND The ship is under sail, and here she comes amain.
Enter COSTARD, for Pompey COSTARD I Pompey am,-- BOYET You lie, you are not he. COSTARD I Pompey am,-- BOYET With libbard's head on knee. BIRON Well said, old mocker: I must needs be friends with thee. COSTARD I Pompey am, Pompey surnamed the Big-- DUMAIN The Great. COSTARD It is, 'Great,' sir:--
Pompey surnamed the Great;That oft in field, with targe and shield, did make my foe to sweat:
And travelling along this coast, I here am come by chance, And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France, If your ladyship would say, 'Thanks, Pompey,'
I had done. PRINCESS Great thanks, great Pompey. COSTARD 'Tis not so much worth; but I hope I was perfect: I made a little fault in 'Great.' BIRON My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves the best Worthy.
Enter SIR NATHANIEL, for Alexander SIR NATHANIEL When in the world I lived, I was the world's commander;By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquering might:
My scutcheon plain declares that I am Alisander,-- BOYET Your nose says, no, you are not for it stands too right. BIRON Your nose smells 'no' in this, most tender-smelling knight. PRINCESS The conqueror is dismay'd. Proceed, good Alexander. SIR NATHANIEL When in the world I lived, I was the world's commander,-- BOYET Most true, 'tis right; you were so, Alisander. BIRON Pompey the Great,-- COSTARD Your servant, and Costard. BIRON Take away the conqueror, take away Alisander. COSTARD [To SIR NATHANIEL] O, sir, you have overthrown Alisander the conqueror! You will be scraped out of the painted cloth for this: your lion, that holds his poll-axe sitting on a close-stool, will be given to Ajax: he will be the ninth Worthy. A conqueror, and afeard to speak! run away for shame, Alisander.
SIR NATHANIEL retires There, an't shall please you; a foolish mild man; an honest man, look you, and soon dashed. He is a marvellous good neighbour, faith, and a very good bowler: but, for Alisander,--alas, you see how 'tis,--a little o'erparted. But there are Worthies a-coming will speak their mind in some other sort.
Enter HOLOFERNES, for Judas; and MOTH, for Hercules HOLOFERNES Great Hercules is presented by this imp, Whose club kill'd Cerberus, that three-headed canis;And when he was a babe, a child, a shrimp, Thus did he strangle serpents in his manus.
Quoniam he seemeth in minority, Ergo I come with this apology.
Keep some state in thy exit, and vanish.
MOTH retires Judas I am,-- DUMAIN A Judas! HOLOFERNES Not Iscariot, sir.
