'Not he,'said the Radical.'He's only shamming;he knows his master is here,and therefore has recourse to these manoeuvres,but it won't do.Come,landlord,what are you staring at?Why don't you obey your orders?Keeping your customers waiting in this manner is not the way to increase your business.'
The landlord looked at the Radical,and then at me.At last,taking the jug and glass,he left the apartment,and presently returned with each filled with its respective liquor.He placed the jug with beer before the Radical,and the glass with the gin and water before the man in black,and then,with a wink to me,he sauntered out.
'Here is your health,sir,'said the man of the snuff-coloured coat,addressing himself to the one in black;'I honour you for what you said about the Church of England.Every one who speaks against the Church of England has my warm heart.Down with it,Isay,and may the stones of it be used for mending the roads,as my friend William says in his Register.'
The man in black,with a courteous nod of his head,drank to the man in the snuff-coloured coat.'With respect to the steeples,'
said he,'I am not altogether of your opinion;they might be turned to better account than to serve to mend the roads;they might still be used as places of worship,but not for the worship of the Church of England.I have no fault to find with the steeples,it is the Church itself which I am compelled to arraign;but it will not stand long,the respectable part of its ministers are already leaving it.It is a bad Church,a persecuting Church.'
'Whom does it persecute?'said I.
The man in black glanced at me slightly,and then replied slowly,'The Catholics.'
'And do those whom you call Catholics never persecute?'said I.
'Never,'said the man in black.
'Did you ever read Foxe's BOOK OF MARTYRS?'said I.
'He!he!'tittered the man in black;'there is not a word of truth in Foxe's BOOK OF MARTYRS.'
'Ten times more than in the FLOS SANCTORUM,'said I.
The man in black looked at me,but made no answer.
'And what say you to the Massacre of the Albigenses and the Vaudois,"whose bones lie scattered on the cold Alp,"or the Revocation of the Edict of Nantes?'
The man in black made no answer.
'Go to,'said I;'it is because the Church of England is not a persecuting church,that those whom you call the respectable part are leaving her;it is because they can't do with the poor Dissenters what Simon de Montfort did with the Albigenses,and the cruel Piedmontese with the Vaudois,that they turn to bloody Rome;the Pope will no doubt welcome them,for the Pope,do you see,being very much in want,will welcome-'
'Hollo!'said the Radical,interfering,'what are you saying about the Pope?I say,hurrah for the Pope;I value no religion three halfpence,as I said before,but if I were to adopt any,it should be the Popish as it's called,because I conceives the Popish to be the grand enemy of the Church of England,of the beggarly aristocracy,and the borough-monger system,so I won't hear the Pope abused while I am by.Come,don't look fierce.You won't fight,you know,I have proved it;but I will give you another chance-I will fight for the Pope,will you fight against him?'
'Oh dear me,yes,'said I,getting up and stepping forward.'I am a quiet peaceable young man,and,being so,am always ready to fight against the Pope-the enemy of all peace and quiet;to refuse fighting for the aristocracy is a widely different thing from refusing to fight against the Pope;so come on,if you are disposed to fight for him.To the Pope broken bells,to Saint James broken shells.No Popish vile oppression,but the Protestant succession.Confusion to the Groyne,hurrah for the Boyne,for the army at Clonmel,and the Protestant young gentlemen who live there as well.'
'An Orangeman,'said the man in black.
'Not a Platitude,'said I.
The man in black gave a slight start.
'Amongst that family,'said I,'no doubt,something may be done,but amongst the Methodist preachers I should conceive that the success would not be great.'
The man in black sat quite still.
'Especially amongst those who have wives,'I added.
The man in black stretched his hand towards his gin and water.
'However,'said I,'we shall see what the grand movement will bring about,and the results of the lessons in elocution.'
The man in black lifted the glass up to his mouth,and,in doing so,let the spoon fall.
'But what has this to do with the main question?'said I;'I am waiting here to fight against the Pope.'
'Come,Hunter,'said the companion of the man in the snuff coloured coat,'get up,and fight for the Pope.'
'I don't care for the young fellow,'said the man in the snuff-coloured coat.
'I know you don't,'said the other,'so get up,and serve him out.'
'I could serve out three like him,'said the man in the snuff-coloured coat.
'So much the better for you,'said the other,'the present work will be all the easier for you,get up,and serve him out at once.'
The man in the snuff-coloured coat did not stir.
'Who shows the white feather now?'said the simple-looking man.
'He!he!he!'tittered the man in black.
'Who told you to interfere?'said the Radical,turning ferociously towards the simple-looking man;'say another word and I'll-'
'And you!'said he,addressing himself to the man in black,'a pretty fellow you to turn against me,after I had taken your part.
I tell you what,you may fight for yourself.I'll see you and your Pope in the pit of Eldon before I fight for either of you,so make the most of it.'
'Then you won't fight?'said I.
'Not for the Pope,'said the Radical;'I'll see the Pope-'
'Dear me!'said I,'not fight for the Pope,whose religion you would turn to,if you were inclined for any.I see how it is,you are not fond of fighting;but I'll give you another chance-you were abusing the Church of England just now:I'll fight for it-will you fight against it?'
'Come,Hunter,'said the other,'get up,and fight against the Church of England.'
