`Ah, Mr.Weller,' says the gen'l'm'n in the chair, `glad to see you, sir;how are you?'--`Werry well, thank'ee, sir,' says my father; `I hope you're pretty middlin',' says he.--'Pretty well, thank'ee, sir,' says the gen'l'm'n;`sit down, Mr.Weller--pray sit down, sir.' So my father sits down, and he and the gen'l'm'n looks werry hard at each other.`You don't remember me?' says the gen'l'm'n.--`Can't say I do,' says my father.--`Oh, I know you,' says the gen'l'm'n; `know'd you when you was a boy,' says he.--`Well, I don't remember you,' says my father.--`That's very odd,' says the gen'l'm'n.--`Werry,'
says my father.--`You must have a bad mem'ry, Mr.Weller,' says the gen'l'm'n.--`Well, it is a wery bad 'un,' says my father.--`I thought so,' says the gen'l'm'n.
So then they pours him out a glass of wine, and gammons him about his driving, and gets him into a reg'lar good humour, and at last shoves a twenty-pound note in his hand.`It's a werry bad road between this and London,' says the gen'l'm'n.--`Here and there it is a heavy road,' says my father.--`'Specially near the canal, I think,' says the gen'l'm'n.--`Nasty bit that 'ere,' says my father.--`Well, Mr.Weller,' says the gen'l'm'n, `you'rea wery good whip, and can do what you like with your horses, we know.We're all wery fond o'you, Mr.Weller, so in case you should have an accident when you're a bringing these here woters down, and should tip 'em over into the canal vithout hurtin' of 'em, this is for yourself,' says he.--`Gen'l'm'n, you're wery kind,' says my father, `and I'll drink your health in another glass of wine,' says he; which he did, and then buttons up the money, and bows himself out.You wouldn't believe, sir," continued Sam, with a look of inexpressible impudence at his master, "that on the wery day as he came down with them woters, his coach was upset on that 'ere wery spot, and ev'ry man on 'em was turned into the canal.""And got out again?" inquired Mr.Pickwick, hastily.
"Why," replied Sam, very slowly, "I rather think one old gen'l'm'n was missin'; I know his hat was found, but I a'n't quite certain whether his head was in it or not.But what I look at, is the hex-traordinary, and wonderful coincidence, that arter what that gen'l'm'n said, my father's coach should be upset in that wery place, and on that wery day!""It is, no doubt, a very extraordinary circumstance indeed," said Mr.
Pickwick."But brush my hat, Sam, for I hear Mr.Winkle calling me to breakfast."With these words Mr.Pickwick descended to the parlour, where he found breakfast laid, and the family already assembled.The meal was hastily despatched; each of the gentleman's hats was decorated with an enormous blue favour, made up by the fair hands of Mrs.Pott herself; and as Mr.
Winkle had undertaken to escort that lady to a house-top, in the immediate vicinity of the hustings, Mr.Pickwick and Mr.Pott repaired alone to the Town Arms, from the back window of which, one of Mr.Slumkey's committee was addressing six small boys, and one girl, whom he dignified, at every second sentence, with the imposing title of "men of Eatanswill," whereat the six small boys aforesaid cheered prodigiously.
The stable-yard exhibited unequivocal symptoms of the glory and strength of the Eatanswill Blues.There was a regular army of blue flags, some with one handle, and some with two, exhibiting appropriate devices, in golden characters four feet high, and stout in proportion.There was a grand band of trumpets, bassoons and drums, marshalled four abreast, and earning their money, if ever men did, especially the drum beaters, who were very muscular.
There were bodies of constables with blue staves, twenty committee-men with blue scarfs, and a mob of voters with blue cockades.There were electors on horseback, and electors a-foot.There was an open carriage and four, for the honourable Samuel Slumkey; and there were four carriages and pair, for his friends and supporters; and the flags were rustling, and the band was playing, and the constables were swearing, and the twenty committee-men were squabbling, and the mob were shouting, and the horses were backing, and the post-boys perspiring; and everybody, and everything, then and there assembled, was for the special use, behoof, honour, and renown, of the honourable Samuel Slumkey, of Slumkey Hall, one of the candidates for the representation of the Borough of Eatanswill, in the Commons House of Parliament of the United Kingdom.
Loud and long were the cheers, and mighty was the rustling of one of the blue flags, with "Liberty of the Press" inscribed thereon, when the sandy head of Mr.Pott was discerned in one of the windows, by the mob beneath; and tremendous was the enthusiasm when the honourable Samuel Slumkey himself, in top-boots, and a blue neckerchief, advanced and seized the hand of the said Pott, and melodramatically testified by gestures to the crowd, his ineffaceable obligations to the Eatanswill Gazette.
"Is everything ready?" said the honourable Samuel Slumkey to Mr.Perker.
"Everything, my dear sir," was the little man's reply.
"Nothing has been omitted, I hope?" said the honourable Samuel Slumkey.
"Nothing has been left undone, my dear sir--nothing whatever.There are twenty washed men at the street door for you to shake hands with; and six children in arms that you're to pat on the head, and inquire the age of; be particular about the children, my dear sir,--it has always a great effect, that sort of thing.""I'll take care," said the honourable Samuel Slumkey.
"And, perhaps, my dear sir--" said the cautious little man, "perhaps if you could --I don't mean to say it's indispensable--but if you could manage to kiss one of 'em, it would produce a very great impression on the crowd.""Wouldn't it have as good an effect if the proposer or seconder did that?" said the honourable Samuel Slumkey.
